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Psychologist

How do I Find a Couples Therapist?

The decision for a couple to turn to therapy is a positive step to not only open lines of communication and understanding but to restore the relationship if that is the goal. But how do you know which therapist is best for and your partner? If you find your relationship would benefit from professional couples therapy but you don’t know how to choose which therapist is right for you, here are some helpful tips.

Articulate the Problem

There are many reasons why a couple would seek therapy, ranging from sexual dysfunction, addiction and death of a loved one to divorce and trauma. While you and your partner may not be able to understand the many nuances of the problem, you both should feel at ease to articulate your concerns and then let the therapist use your input to develop the best plan to suit your needs.

Experience and Education

While many therapists offer many of the qualities you are seeking, each couple is unique and not all therapists are prepared or trained to work with their specific needs. When seeking out a couple’s therapist, be sure they have the education and training to provide the best care for you. Your perspective couples therapist should encourage you to ask questions about their background; you should also peruse the practice’s Web site to understand their approach to counseling and therapy.

Open-Minded

Many therapists are adept at working with couples, however, they may be uncomfortable or unprepared to discuss some of the more personal or nuanced aspects of a modern long-term relationship. A therapist who doesn’t judge and remains open-minded about “alternative” lifestyles that may include BDSM, polyamory, and swinging can provide the insight and guidance you need while navigating non-traditional relationships. Likewise, if required, the therapist should be as comfortable working with gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, and non-binary/genderqueer couples as he or she would with a heterosexual couple.

Dealing with Infidelity

Infidelity doesn’t have to be the nail in a relationship’s coffin. Seeking counseling for infidelity – whether intimate or cyber – with the support of a knowledgeable and trained therapist can lead to a greater understanding of underlying problems in a relationship.

Goal-oriented

A couple that mutually agrees to seek counseling should have goals in mind. Whether it’s strengthening the relationship; overcoming loss; re-establishing trust, intimacy and mutual respect; or seeking the best ways to part amicably, your therapist should be willing to work toward your goals, offering guidance and flexibility as you and your partner progress in your sessions.

Couples Therapy in Montclair, NJ

Seeking the right therapist for you and your partner shouldn’t be a guessing game. In Montclair, NJ, Advanced Psychology Partners provides individualized, discreet and results-oriented counseling and therapy that can help you through the bumps and bruises that can occur in any committed relationship. Our expert team of Donna Lobiondo, MDiv, Ph.D. and Eric Larsen, MA, LPC ensures couples get the expert and caring counseling they need in a judgment-free, safe space. To schedule an appointment with Donna or Eric, use our online form, or call us at (973) 534-5333. Be sure to ask about our FREE 10-minute phone consultation to see if our services are right for you and your partner.

Eight Questions to Ask Your New Psychologist

Having a new psychologist can be the beginning of an incredible and helpful relationship. Whether a friend recommended their therapist or a doctor referred you to a colleague they believe does good work, you probably have some trust in their judgment to listen to them, even though there may be some information you will want to learn for yourself about their background before you begin. Here are eight questions you should ask your new psychologist:

What are your techniques in therapy?

You’ll probably get a sense of their methods once you start your therapy sessions, but it might put you at ease to know their ways of connecting and helping patients ahead of time.

What can I expect during each session?

There may not be a uniform way that your therapist holds a session. If there is a particular activity that your therapist plans on employing in your sessions, this question will help clue you into that.

How is my confidentiality assured?

If confidentiality is a concern for you, as it is for most people, you may want to know how they keep your information.  They should be compliant with all laws and rules, and ethical in their dealings. If you psychologist uses smart technology such as Facetime or chat apps, are they HIPAA compliant?

Are you available in case of an emergency, such as on weekends or holidays?

Some, not all, therapists give patients a contact number whenever they need to talk outside of sessions.  However, most of the time they are in sessions with other clients, so you will likely have to leave a message and wait for a response. Some may be available after hours, some may not. This is something to discuss with your therapist.

How long are sessions?

A typical session is usually about an hour. Depending on the type of therapist you see and what your goal is, this can be longer. You’ll also want to know for your own scheduling purposes.

How much does a session cost?

If you have insurance, you may have a small copayment. If not, you’ll definitely want to know how much the sessions cost, as they can be costly over time.

What are your typical methods of treatment?

Some psychologists prefer to take more natural, holistic routes of treatment. Others may recommend medications. These will be prescribed by a psychiatrist or your physician.

How did you get into the field of therapy/counseling?

Some patients are skeptical of the motives and abilities of their therapist, especially if they’ve never met with one before. Understanding your therapist’s drive or passion for their career may boost your confidence in their abilities and their desire to help you.

Ask questions that may be specific to your needs or concerns, such as scheduling, past therapy experiences, medications you’re on, whether you are also seeing a psychiatrist if you have any substance abuse concerns, and if you don’t feel safe in your current environment.

You can achieve sexual health with the professionals at Advanced Psychology Partners. Serving patients of all sexual orientation, Advanced Psychology Partners offers personalized, results-oriented therapy in a comfortable, private environment. Choose the therapist you wish to confide in and you will be treated with the utmost discretion, compassion, and respect. To take the first step on the road to recovery, request an appointment today.

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